So...You Want to Be a Screenwriter—Snap out of It!

I am a screenwriter.  I started writing professionally as a screenwriter.  I will always be a screenwriter because it's fun and I'm hooked and I'm good at it.  But, I say this with all sincerity and compassion—do yourself a favor and start writing novels and self-publish.

I say this because there is no market for screenplays.  I say this because so many screenwriters think a sale a year will make them rich (NOT!).  I say this because, as the wonderful John August (Big Fish, Go, Charlie's Angles) says, " ... you’re never as broke [as a newly employed screenwriter] as when you first start making money."  There is no real outlet for screenwriters to be writers and find an audience as writers. Just consider the Writers Guild of America's (WGA) statistics from its 2011 Annual Report (2012 report for 2011 isn't out yet):

Out of roughly 10,500 members, in 2010:

• 4,244 reported income overall (@4%)
• 1,615 reported income from features (@2%)
• 3,142 reported income in television (@3%)
  (Deadline Hollywood, Nikki Finke 2011)

So, even screenwriters who have "made it" and join the WGA number under 5% annually.  Of these, even a smaller percentage make "big money."  What about all the other screenwriters?  All the many thousands who are not in the WGA, but who think it's only a matter of time before their lottery ticket gets hit by lightning on their birthday on a leap year?  They beat their heads against the gatekeepers walls and doors and write their fingers to the bone and make NO money—ever.  This is the vast majority of screenwriters.  This is the reality of the movie and TV business.  It's called "the business" and not "the art" for a reason.  But, "the business" is stacked against you (us).  It is siloed and a closed shop.  It is designed to keep you out, not to invite you in.  Everything about Hollywood is designed to make it as hard as possible to "break in."  None of this reality check will not stop anyone who wants in, however.  Once bitten by the bug it is impossible to talk reason into the smitten (I know of what I speak, I'm one of them).

And so this missive.  If you have to write screenplays, fine.  Go for it.  Just know there is no market for them.  Everyone is competing for the same, few potential buyers (and I mean few), and there are already 10-thousand professionals who are inside the walls and have preferential access due to their WGA status.  Sorry, it doesn't matter that you have the best story ever written—no one will ever read it, due to the closed system. So, where do you sell your script?  The indie film market?  Most producers will ask you to write for free or pay you a couple thousand and promise to pay Guild minimum when they make a sale.  Good luck with that.

So, where else will you sell your great American screenplay?  Nowhere is where.  If you can't get a studio to buy, or a production company, or a legitimate indie producer, there is no other outlet.  Like I said, there is NO market for screenplays outside of these few and restricted points of sale.

But, there is hope. You are a writer. You don't have to beat your head against Hollywood's door.  You can write something else, you can write somewhere else!  The world of writing has changed forever, and is changing as I write this.  Writers can actually make money, find readers, and find satisfaction in their work through the wonderful world of self-publishing and e-books. But, you've heard about all this.  You know about e-books.  "That's fine," you lament, "but, I'm a screenwriter."  So, drop the "screen" part and just be the other part (hint: starts with a "w" and ends with an "r").  You can do this, honest. 

Writers, nowadays, can ill afford to specialize if they want to make a living doing what they love; and for the first time in publishing history it is actually possible for a writer to make a living writing.  Writers have to diversify with their work: short stories, plays, novels, novellas, screenplays, etc.  Most of these can be put up on the Internet and generate readers and money.  I know screenwriters who have put up old short stories (20 years old!) and people buy them.  And they are feeling like real writers for the first time in their lives.  They have fans, they have market share (small as it is) and they are making some money.  Not with their screenplays—nobody wants those, nobody will read those, nobody cares.  But, e-books and short stories and novellas—you bet.

If you are a screenwriter who must write screenplays, knock yourself out.  But, do yourself a favor and learn how to write prose fiction.  Self-publish and discover a world that has been custom built for you as a writer.  In this new world, people won't rewrite what you write, people won't tell you to turn all your characters into robots, people won't hire other writers to completely fuck up your story and you will actually be appreciated and thanked (imagine that) for doing what you do. You may not get rich, but you will make some money—guaranteed more than you will screenwriting! 


So, consider my words.  Consider what is waiting for you on the Internet right now.  Consider actually writing for readers and not for trust-fund-baby, wannabe-writers playing movie producer (because that's who most of us screenwriters end up writing for—not Paramount!). Just consider ...

Now go be brilliant.

(Note: Some have said to me that this post makes self-publishing sound like it's easy and a bonanza for money. NO, NO, NO... none of this is easy.  My point here is that screenwriting will get you basically nowhere.  Self-publishing will at least get you somewhere... not a panacea, but a real outlet for your work.  No such possibility exists with screenwriting.)

How's Your Premise?: The 7-Step Premise Development & Testing Process Workshop

Venue: The Writers Junction
Location: 1001 Colorado Blvd., Santa Monica, CA
When: Sat June 9, 2012
How Much: $65
Time: 1PM–4:30PM
Who should attend: Screenwriters, Novelists, Nonfiction Authors

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A Storygeeks Workshop

Click to Register: http://premiseprocess.eventbrite.com/ (LIMITED SEATING)

At a Glance

• In-person seminar on how to develop the perfect premise line for any story
• Covers the essentials of premise development, log line development, and premise-idea testing
• Teaches the two essential structures necessary to tell any story
• Come prepared to work on at least one of your premise ideas
• Appropriate for screenwriters, novelists, and creative nonfiction authors

A solid premise line is essential in writing effective agent or publisher query letters, pitching film production companies or studios, or for having that perfect elevator pitch ready for that unexpected meeting with whoever might be empowered to move your story forward to final publication or production. But, how do you know you really have a story? And how do you know your story will “work”?

The way you know is by learning the real meaning, purpose, and power of the premise line. The premise line is not just a “pitch tool,” it is your canary in the coalmine and when fully mastered can save you time, money, and literally years of writing frustration. In this hands-on course, participants will learn how to master the dynamic process of premise line creation, design and testing which are so critical for validating any story’s narrative integrity. Along with case studies from the movies and literature, participants will take original story ideas and then implement premise building and testing techniques to generate an original premise line, as well as developing a story’s log line.

Over the course of this 3-hour workshop, you’ll learn:

The 2 Essential Structures Needed to Tell Any Story

• The 7 components of the Invisible Structure
• The 7 components of the Visible Structure
• The real definition of “story premise”

The 7-Step Premise Development Process

• How to determine if you really have a story
• The anatomy of a premise line
• Case studies from film and literature

Premise Typing: Know What Kind of Premise You Have

• The soft-generic premise
• The 7 components of every high-concept premise
• What is a log line and why you need one
• What is a tag line and why you need one

The 7-Step Premise & Idea Testing Method

• Learn the Premise Testing Checklist
• Test and validate your own premise idea

If you are ready to learn real tools that will lead to productive and profitable writing, then this workshop is for you. Sign up today!

Scriptchat with Jeff Lyons on May 20th, 2012

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 A FREE STORYGEEKS EVENT

Venue: Euro Scriptchat

Location:  At the designated time, go to TWEETCHAT or search the hashtag #scriptchat on the web, Tweetdeck or Seesmic and jump in.

When: Sunday, May 20, 2012

How Much: FREE

Time: EURO chat 8pm GMT/BST 
          (USA time is 3pm EST/EDT (12pm PST/PDT)

Who should attend: ANYONE interested in talking story and screenwriting


THANK YOU to the folks at Scriptchat for this opportunity.  Hope to "see" you there.

The Magick Formula™: Plot=Character=Story

Recently, I was teaching a workshop on premise line development.  In that class I defined the terms “character,” “plot,” and “story” (as I use them; a bit differently than many). The resulting chaos this caused among the writer-students was startling.  Okay, I have developed my own interpretation of these classical terms d’art, and this alone is enough to cause angst and even rebellion if writers have entrenched ideas about what these terms mean.  But, in this case, I was struck by the sheer panic that engulfed the writers in my workshop.  It was like watching one of those old movies when the villagers in a backward, medieval town see their first eclipse of the sun: alarm, dread, shouts of “burn the witch!”

Fortunately, before the pike sticks came out, I was able to calm the waters and bring back the sun with some reason and logic, and a little whimpering, “Please don’t hurt me.”  The incident, however, was important for me because it underscored how much confusion and useless information there is out there for writers, and how falling back on dry, academic definitions for things like “character” and “plot” help no one in their writing process. 

What do I mean?  When I asked the writers how they defined these terms, I got things like:

“Plot is a series of events that make up a story.”

“A character is a person in a story who carries out actions.”

“A story is a recounting of a progression of events; i.e., a narrative.”

There are, of course, a billion other definitions “out there,” but these are pretty much how most people understand these terms.  While perhaps academically sound, I don’t think these kinds of definitions are useful when it comes to actually telling a story.  I’m about actionable results.  Writers need tools that actually help them write; and definitions like the three above help not at all. 

And so I offer my (i.e., the Storygeeks) approach to dealing with these contentious terms: plot=character=story.  I call this the Magick Formula™.  Mathematically, it is pure gibberish.  But, as a metaphor it symbolizes the true relationship between character, plot, and story in a way that demonstrates the individual building blocks of any story, but also their inseparable relationship.  To use a graphic analogy, the formula can be thought of as conjoined triplets: three distinct individuals, but one, physical person.  They know what the others are thinking, they finish each other’s sentences, and they act in synergy with the whole being more than the sum of its parts.  All for one, and one for all—literally.

Phrased as a statement, the formula says: plot is the “what” of what happens on the page and (=) what happens on the page is determined by what characters “do” at the scene level (in books or screenplays), but what characters “do” at the scene level is dependent on who they are as people and (=) the thing that results is a story.

So, for me, plot, character, and story are individual concepts, but they have no real value or usefulness unless they are used as metaphors for one another.  Meaning, at a fundamental level these three ideas are the same thing (thus the equal signs in the formula).  It’s paradoxical, they are distinct, but they are also one.  You can’t really separate them, if you have a real story.

It might become clearer if you see how I define these terms:

Character: The combined effect of psychological need, moral lacking, and/or motivation that generates a causal sequence of actions resulting in emotional change.

Plot: The causal sequence of scenes that constitute the "what" of what happens in a story that originates from, and is at service to, the motivations behind the actions taken by characters.

Story: The combination and interplay of character and plot that is a metaphor for a human experience.

(Definitions excerpted from The Anatomy of a Premise Line: 7 Steps to Foolproof Premise and Story
Development.  Bookbyte Digital, 2012)

In other words, a character acts based on who they are, they don’t just do any old thing in a scene because it’s cool.  They rob the bank because they can’t not rob the bank, they dump the girlfriend because it is in their DNA to dump the girlfriend, they take the road trip because they would never not think of taking a road trip; their actions are who they are, not just things they do.  The consequences for plotting are profound.  The “what” of what happens can only be character-consistent action; nothing can happen because it’s cool, or edgy, or something the writer just likes.  Things happen on the page because story action equals character-in-action, and all these action-moments coalesce and combine to make a story. 

Not one of these ideas (plot, character, story) can really function without the other two.  This is quite a departure from some consensus, academic definition of a story as being a progression of events.  The consensus definition might get you a good grade in lit class, but won't help you write a real story. 

So, the above definitions are the things that generated all the heat and anxiety in my workshop.  But, after having the same reasoned conversation with my writer-students that we are having now, they ended up nodding their heads and saying, “Yeah, I can actually use that stuff in my writing.”  Which is the point.  Like I said, I’m all about actionable, real-world results.  This Magick Formula™ is not just a cutesy play on words; it actually means something and can teach you a crucial truth about storytelling: character, plot, and story are connected at the heart. 

In the days ahead, I’m going to take each of these concepts and write separate posts on each to give more detail and explanation.  But, this post can at least establish the big picture about the fundamental interrelationship between plot, character, and story. I hope this doesn’t make you want to start screaming, “Burn the witch.”  If it does, trust that the sun will shine again and there is no witchcraft involved.  It’s just good ol’, plain story sense.

Now, go be brilliant.

Lyttle-Lytton Contest Winner 2012! (so bad it's good)

I love the Lyttle Lytton contest. Each year the worst of the worst are featured. It is "WWW"—"wretched writers welcome."

Here is an article reprinted from Gallycat (one of my favorite sites) on this year's winner:

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By Jason Boog on April 16, 2012

Davian Aw has won the 2012 Lyttle Lytton contest, writing an awful sentence in 25 words or fewer. Here is the winning sentence:

“Agent Jeffrey’s trained eyes rolled carefully around the room, taking in the sights and sounds.”

The contest was inspired by the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, a famous challenge to write the worst opening to a novel. Many of these winning entries are quite long, so the Lyyttle Lytton contest limits entries to 25 words or fewer. Founder Adam Cadre explained why Aw won the contest:

"When I read the first half of this, I thought, yes, I’ve heard editors grumbling about the use of 'eyes” for “gaze': '‘Her eyes landed on his lapel pin’ — didn’t that hurt?' Then I reached the 'and sounds' part and knew this one would be tough to beat. There were entries at which I laughed more, but the combination of craft, plausibility, and cringe factor — and, yes, laughs — put this one on top."

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Ok, now go be brilliant—wont' be hard after this!